“You are not a true adult until both of your parents have passed on. You are then an orphan.” –attributed to John Kennedy (Jr.) on the death of his mother, Jacqueline Onassis.
I got the call from my cousin on a Sunday afternoon last April. My mother had been found dead, sitting upright in her chair at her home. The call had come while I was walking around the Vancouver Maritime Museum with my son. My father and I had liked to visit there 40 years earlier. He had passed away in 1995, so I was now an orphan.
As I cleared out our family home with my sister, digging through the past in the aftermath, not only did I discover more about the “real people” behind my mom and dad, but, much to my surprise, quite a bit about the person behind me. This grieving process, although at times difficult, has actually made me feel stronger about my own identity.
Perhaps flying through life without “backup” really does bring forth one’s inner adult, and you discover who you really are. This is what Re Searching My Self is intended to be: part family history, part self-discovery. It is a sharing of the evolution of my own identity, as I mine through the relics of my parents lives.